The Value of Doubt
December 16, 2009I have long studied “Faith” seeking to overcome the negative affects of Doubt.
However recently I have recognised that my doubts have had a prioritising effect on me, I was recently talking with a friend who had a severe crisis of faith, however he still held to key values (love & respect your family, work hard, and help others) this helped me to realise that if you remove all the “White Noise” from my life, whom am I really ? What have I done that is good in the world? Do I need to do good?
What if God does not exist, what if all this is false, what if the spiritual feelings I have are purely physiological, what if there is no after life ?
what do I want from life, The Church emphasises these same three values, but can I get lost preparing for the next world at the expense of this life, We can be kept very busy in the church with Callings, Home Teaching, Family History, Temple Work, Missionary Efforts, etc etc all of which are good things and can help people but are we missing the point. Whilst we have people suffering of hunger thirst and fatigue, whilst there are children neglected, whilst there are people dying ! are our priorities correct?
Whether God exist or not surely our highest priority should be to focus our efforts on helping those in need, many times we are willing to give someone a sermon rather than bread & water, I believe in God, I believe Christ leads the LDS Church however because of my doubts I’m reassessing my priorities, am I ignoring those who are hungry, naked, and suffering because I’m busy doing my temple file ?
At a recent Stake Conference Priesthood Leadership I spoke on the importance of doubt as an important step in moving toward to faith.
I personally think that you raise some important questions in two different directions.
The relationship between faith/doubt/knowledge is a complex one and it seems that there is constant slippage between them.
The question that pertains regarding who we live our life as a result of our doubts. I find it hard to be motivated to do temple work or missionary work because our doctrine suggests an it-will-be-all-right-in-the-end mentality.
So for me it is not even doubt that leads me to a similar position, it is my faith.
“it-will-be-all-right-in-the-end mentality.
So for me it is not even doubt that leads me to a similar position, it is my faith.”
I agree with you on this, however I guess my faith in a given subject allowed me to justify my neglect.
What do I do with this new perspective, do I instead of using a Saturday going to the Temple spend that time walking the streets handing out food and talking to the homeless ?
In my view, I find the temple inspiring and spiritually nourishing. I do not go for my kindred dead, but go for myself. Their salvation is ancillary to me being there.
If I were an orthodox member I would say to you, ‘well food only feeds people for a day, but going to the temple gives someone eternal salvation’. This does not sit well with me.
I sense that God does not expect all things from everyone. He expects or knows that some will be temple goers and some will be helpers of the homeless. some will minister in high profile callings and some will minister in their wards. The difference each can take is different and both is needed. I feel that my responsibility to is take these new perspectives and try and see how they fit into what God wants from me.
For example, I am called as a Bishop. I try and do that in a specific way that i feel that I should. I emphasise certain things. Other Bishops will do it differently and with good reason. Aside from that I feel inspired or called (or part of my personal ministry) to be someone that encourages a thoughtful engagement with Mormonism. I feel that there is feel power in thinking and sharing and doing that in a community where we know and appreciate one another (hence Steaks of Zion and Crumpets and De-Caff). I want to help people explore their talents in a mormon context.
This is not helping the homeless but I feel that it is important and fits in with what God wants for us.
Sorry for rambling on.
I agree with your thoughts on the Temple,
“I sense that God does not expect all things from everyone.” although I agree with your sentiments in theory, what method do we use to rationalise our action ?
I respect your feelings regarding your personal ministry, however I’m still struggling with what is the right thing for me to do, do I keep organising Christmas parties and social activities or walk a completely new path one in which I am not sure I can measure up to.
What is right for you is a matter of negotiation with God and will not always be the same thing. It will be a struggle to discover and may not come in a revelatory form.
I am not sure that you have to walk a new path, that seems like a false dichotomy, can’t these new feelings be incorporated into your current path.